While rules have their place, breaking rules can liberate you from their expectations. When we have a rule in place and things don’t happen according to the rule we become disappointed.
So what I want to challenge you guys on today is having less stringent rules.
There’s a guy who had quintuplets (5 kids at the same time), and when his kids were about 7-8 years old they interviewed him. When they asked him for his advice to young parents, all he said was “Have less rules.”
He said every time a child breaks a rule you get angry. So if you have too many rules in place and five 7-8 year olds you’ll constantly be angry.
Now of course kids need to have rules in place, but having less stringent rules for small things might have saved him a lot of pain.
That said, you have to know what your values are and certain rules aren’t negotiable. For example, if somebody judges someone else based on their outward appearance in front of me, I will have none of that.
I’ve noticed three problems with people I’ve encountered:
- They have too many rules.
- They don’t reward the right rules.
- They have rules that contradict each other.
The challenge I have for you today is, what rules are you living by and are they serving you?
What rules have you put in place that are causing conflict in your life?
Those are rules you have to challenge because if you have too many rules, you’re going to cause yourself a lot of pain. Nobody wants to live in a constant state of disappointment.
Sometimes in life you have to expect less and appreciate more.
This week, be consciously aware of when you’re feeling disappointed. What expectation did you have and how was it not met? If it’s not valid, remove it. If it’s valid, make it less stringent so you can expect less disappointment and make it more empowering.
Keep on changing the game.
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