How to handle rejection

 

The other day while having drinks with my cousin I saw this really pretty girl. I thought we had a vibe so when I saw her going to the bar I decided to approach her. I greeted her and told her she’d caught my eye but then her response was,

“Who are you talking to?”

“You,” I said jokingly, “I mean there’s no one else here.”

She went quiet and gave me this death stare, so eventually I wished her a good night.

I felt so rejected.

As I gave myself a pep talk, I concluded that a 20 second observation shouldn’t get to me. She didn’t know what I’m passionate about, my intentions, how I connect with people or all the things I pride myself on me being who I am.

It got me thinking about how we handle rejection because we’ve all been rejected at some point right?

When last were you rejected and how did it feel?

I think when we feel rejected, we’re expecting somebody to like us without them knowing who we are. When you feel rejected just know they’re rejecting your offer – not who you are.

I’m coaching quite a few people around property investing and in order to make money, you have to buy below market value. That gap between what you pay and what you sell it for is where your profit lies. A lot of times your offers on properties get rejected.

A client was crying when she called me and said, “Laurens, these people rejected my offer.”

I could hear she wasn’t feeling rejected by the offer but rather that SHE was being rejected. She saw her offer and herself as the same thing. She’d internalised the seller’s “no” to the offer as though they were saying no to her as a person.

I can understand why she felt that way and I think it’s normal. So we have to tell ourselves a different story. Next time you get rejected, don’t stay there too long. Remember that they’re rejecting a small portion of you – they’re not rejecting you as a person.

Keep on changing the game.

 

Much love,

Laurens

For more information please go to www.laurensboel.com

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